Home Sweet Home

We had a wonderful time in sunny California, but are very happy to be home again in snowy Maryland. After a week of sunshine it felt very cold when we stepped off the airplane last night. There is no place sweeter than home after any trip away.

The wedding was beautiful. My niece and and her new husband were so cute and happy. The wedding was a perfect reflection of who they are. As a great-aunt my favorite moment was watching my brother, her Grandpa Joe, dance with his his granddaughter the bride. It was such a sweet moment in time.

It was wonderful to have time to visit with my two brothers. We don't get to see each other often. Long time readers of this blog remember my sister-in-law Jean who suffered in a severe head injury two years ago. She now lives in a rehab hospital and is totally paralyzed on one side. For the occasion of this wedding a specially equipped van was hired, a beautiful new dress was purchased, and Jean attended the wedding. Seeing her dressed up and happy filled us all with a little extra joy.

After the wedding we headed south and enjoyed a few days of vacation in San Diego. We visited zoo where we went on our honeymoon.

I don't think I have changed much in the last fifty years, but this time I toured the zoo in a wheelchair.

We took a tour boat and saw the sights of the San Diego harbor and soaked up the sun.

We rubbed shoulders with the rich while eating lunch on the sun deck of the posh Hotel Del Coronado. The sun reflecting of the ocean made the Pacific look like a sea of diamonds.

Now I look out the window at my snow covered yard. It is good to be home.

California

Early tomorrow morning we are leaving for California. This is a bit sooner than I I would have chosen to travel, but there a very good reasons for going now.

My great-niece is getting married on Saturday. I love weddings.

There will be a wonderful family reunion and time with people we seldom see. Living on opposite coasts does make frequent visits hard.

We can enjoy a trip down memory lane as we visit places important to our childhood.

I can put flowers on my folks graves. I don't why this seems so important to me. I know they are not in a cemetery. They still live in my heart and influence my everyday.

We get to go to the San Diego Zoo. Last time we were there was on our honeymoon almost fifty years ago.

My recovery from the foot surgery is not quite complete so I get to ride a wheelchair through the airport and get on the plane during pre-boarding. I will feel so special.

It is warm and sunny in southern California, with temperatures in the seventies. Snow is predicted in Maryland.

MLK Day

This morning I attended an interfaith community service to honor the work and legacy of Dr King. It was an inspiring service attended by young and old, black and white, Christian, Jewish and Muslim Americans. It was a time to reflect on victories against injustice and to look at all the work that lies before us. We came away grateful for the progress our nation has made and determined to continue to make our world a better place. My Bible verse for today is from Micah, chapter six,

And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.
Mic 6:8

Several years ago I drew this picture of two of my grandsons playing at the beach. When I look at these boys I am grateful for the legacy of Martin Luther King Jr.

Unscrewed

I am home with one less screw in my foot. The procedure today took only about thirty minutes. The worst part was the ginormous needles the doc used for the nerve block to numb my foot. After that I could only feel some pressure and pulling. It was a weird feeling to feel the doctor unscrewing the screw in my foot. It is a little hard to walk tonight because my foot is still numb. This should be only a small bump on my road to recovery. I expect to back on track in a day or two.

Foot Update

I saw my foot surgeon this morning for my five month follow-up. He said the bones have healed well and everything looks good, EXCEPT one of the screws is little bit too long. The offending screw sticks into the joint space between the foot and the ankle and causes pain whenever I flex my foot. The screw has to come out. So tomorrow morning I head back to the OR to have it removed. The doctor assures me that this is a very minor procedure. The only reason it must be done in the OR is the need to see it with the X-ray so he knows just where to cut. He will make a small incision and just pull the bugger out. It will be done with only local anesthesia. I should be able to walk the next day. This has to be done before I can begin physical therapy to increase my strength and range of motion. I am actually pretty bummed about it. The doctor says it is a minor procedure, but anytime it is my body being cut it becomes major.

The Loyal Opposition

Yesterday's tragic shootings in Arizona have made me very sad. A mentally unstable young man killed several people out of a hatred for our government. Many believe that extremest, violent political rhetoric encouraged him to do this terrible thing.

Politics in our country has become very divisive. Loud voices from the extreme right and the extreme left provoke fear and hatred. Politicians with opposing views post pictures of their opponents in the cross-hairs of a rifle and encourage people to take aim. People with different political views are called awful names. Opposing points of view are labeled un-American. The name-calling and extremism have made it hard to even understand what another person is saying. I often want to just stick my head in the sand and ignore the whole mess. Then something like the shooting in Arizona happens and I can't ignore it anymore.

In this big country of ours there are obviously going to be different ideas on the best way to handle the complex problems of our time. We live in a big, diverse world with big complicated issues. There are no easy answers to these problems. My personal political view is on the liberal side. Many of my friends and family are far more conservative and have different ideas than mine on the best policy for a particular situation. None of us really have enough information to know what is truly the best choice. We have to talk to each other and discuss our ideas and our understanding and our goals. Sometimes we have to compromise and not get our way. We have to quit calling each other names. We can never encourage or condone violence.

In the English parliament the minority party often is referred to as the loyal opposition. I like this term. It indicated that there is disagreement about policy without questioning the fact of patriotism. Somehow we have to understand that good, patriotic people can disagree about issues without calling one another names. We have to respect each other and learn to listen to each other.

Can we please speak more softly and listen with open minds?

I love this country. It is my home.

God bless us all.

Chair Yoga

As a symbol and a promise of my continuing recovery my beloved and I signed up for a series of chair yoga sessions. I am loving this yoga class. My daughter and her good friend have opened a new yoga studio. One of their offerings is chair yoga which is perfect for those of us who have trouble standing up for for long periods. The studio is beautiful with big windows looking out into a lovely garden. I look forward to watching winter turn into spring through those windows. By the time time the garden is green and once again filled with flowers I expect to be walking and dancing with a grateful heart. For today I am content to stretch my arms and imagine I am one of the butterflies that decorate the room.

I love my yoga teacher . She is a beautiful soul.

Anticipation

For the past five months about all I have done is sit in a chair and let my foot heal. My sweet husband has done the shopping, cooking, cleaning and laundry. In addition to that he has been a patient and loving nurse to me. I have gotten pretty good at being pampered while doing nothing. As the pain leaves and I begin to walk I am full of anticipation about beginning to do things again. Things that were just chores are things I really am looking forward to doing again.

I want to go grocery shopping. I want to see what is on sale and what looks good each week. I want to browse through the produce department and pick out fresh fruits and vegetables. I want to look at the meat and pick it out myself. I want to run into friends and neighbors and stop and chat for a few minutes. I should be able to do this in just a few more weeks. In the future I promise to appreciate the joy of grocery shopping.

I want to cook dinner and clean up my kitchen.

I want to go to the pool. I want to walk into the locker room and laugh with my friends as we change into our swim suits. I want to move through the water and feel my muscles getting stronger again. I want to soak in the hot tub and relax after a good swim.

I want to do the laundry.

When warm weather comes this spring I want to work in my yard. I want to plant flowers and pull weeds. I want to climb on a step ladder and trim the bushes. I promise not to complain about having to weed the garden.

I want to walk. I want to take long walks without needing to stop because of the pain. I want to walk the familiar streets of my neighborhood and strange, faraway streets where I have never walked before. I want to walk on the beach with the surf pounding in my ears. I want to walk through the woods and listen to the birds. I want to walk through the airport to the furthermost gate and fly again on a jet plane to some wonderful destination.

Recovery has been a long time coming, but it is is getting nearer each day. With each day's improvement I grow more excited about the things I can do.

I can hardly wait for all the wonderful things I will be able do in2011.

2010 In Review

It is an interesting exercise to look back over the year. Much has happened in my little corner of the world. As a review of 2010 I've chosen a sentence a month from the past year.

January
My main occupation since the beginning of this new year has been trying to stay warm.

February
Our winter road trip through the deep south was a wonderful experience. Each day was different from the day before, full of different sights and emotions.

March
I spent the weekend in the Pennsylvania mountains with forty of my girlfriends. The speaker was my older daughter. She shared her journey of faith with words and music that inspired a room full of women.

April
It is hard to find words to describe all the emotions involved in watching our grandson become one of the nation's newest airmen. Of course we are very proud of him.

May
Today I received an email from Iraq.

“HI MOM! happy mothers day i miss you and the family i would like to talk to you soon”

June
If you had asked me a year ago if Paul could walk a 5K I would have laughed at the improbability of the idea. Saturday Paul was laughing as we all cheered him across the finish line.

July
It was obvious the our Todd had found the perfect woman to be his wife. Pam adores Todd and is so proud of her soldier. Courtney refers to him as Dad. They are counting the days until he returns home again.Todd called the next morning. For the first time in more than eight years I heard his voice. He sounded so good. I cried.

August
I have been spending a lot of time with pain since my foot surgery five days ago. Pain just takes over your life and colors everything you see and do.

September
Sunday I was finally able to get to church. It felt so good to be back.

October
I saw the doctor this morning for a follow-up appointment. He is quite pleased with my recovery. It will be a little longer than I expected, but I will walk again.

November
This morning my seventeen-year-old granddaughter Sofie had her keys blessed. Sofie received something quite wonderful when she returned to the church parking lot. She had received a phone call from the admissions office of the University of New Haven. Not only had she been admitted, she was awarded a significant scholarship.

December
I can walk!

10 Joys of Christmas 2010

We've enjoyed a wonderful Christmas holiday this year. I'll share ten of the joys.

1. Joy one came on Thursday evening. We had just finished a Christmas Eve Eve supper at daughter number 2's home. We were trying not to talk about our young airman because he would not be home for the first time this year. The US Air Force wouldn't let him off. Then the door opened and in walked John. There was much screaming and crying and laughter as we rejoiced that he was home. Our family does love a good surprise.

2. Any grandmother will tell you that getting the whole family together at the same time in the same place is one of life's greatest joys. Here we are posing for a picture for gramma.

3.This year the simple act of walking around my house and being able to help with day's festivities was glorious. Not being able to walk for more than four months makes me very appreciative of my growing mobility.

4. My grandsons the manly men were having such fun together. They do make me smile.

5. My beautiful granddaughters bring us hugs and great joy.

6. Being part of the candlelit singing of “Silent Night” always makes me cry. Sharing it with family and friends makes it seem like a bit of heaven.

7. My husband, who is still a little boy at heart, spent most of Christmas Eve putting together a marvelous marble machine so he would have a toy on Christmas morning.

8.Our daughter adopted a blue-footed-boobie in our name. I love blue-footed-boobies.

9. No Christmas would be complete without festive neon yellow sweatshirts for the whole family.

10.The greatest joy is the love that fills the air and surrounds us all with love that makes us count our blessings and remember who we are. God is good.

"What's A Virgin?"

One evening just before Christmas, 1969, I was at the piano picking out some Christmas songs. My six-year-old daughter joined me on the piano bench and we sang together,“Silent night, Holy night, round yon virgin..,” when she stopped singing. She looked at me and asked,”Mommy, what's a virgin?” Ahh, one of those questions every mother looks forward to answering. I said something to the effect that Joseph didn't help Mary get pregnant like daddy helped mommy get pregnant. She looked startled and said, “I didn't know daddy had anything to do with that!” She then seemed to loose interest in the subject and went off to play with her little sister and brothers.

The next day my six-year-old went grocery shopping with me. I was in the check-out lane and she was sitting in the cart's child seat. Just as the clerk began ringing up my order my daughter decided she had one more question. She asked in a loud, clear voice for all the store to hear,”Mommy, just what did daddy do to help get you pregnant?”

That little girl is now the mother of two grown children. I have greatly enjoyed watching her answer their questions.

I can walk!

Christmas 1963

1963 was one of those years when everything in my world changed. I left my full time career as a nurse because I was pregnant. Hospital policy did not allow nurses to work after the second trimester. I became a mother. My husband accepted a job at NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center. We packed all our worldly belongings into a moving van and sent them off to Maryland. We moved out of our cute little house in Santa Monica and moved back to Whittier where we lived with my parents for the last month of the year. I was so in awe my beautiful newborn daughter that all the big changes going on in my life faded into the background.

Christmas morning I dressed my baby in a cute little red Santa suit. My day revolved around her. She seemed to delight in the Christmas lights. My family all delighted in her. The importance of our impending move across the country had not really sunk in with me. I didn't realize that this would be the last time I would celebrate Christmas with my parents, my brothers and my nieces. I did not realize that my role in life would largely change from being a daughter to being a mother. Two weeks later we left California and flew to Maryland.

The next Christmas I was large with child and my doctor advised against traveling across the country for the holidays. Santa found us in Maryland. Our house filled with children and we always stayed home for Christmas. I missed my California family. Every year when we put up our tree I would call home and exclaim, “ It's the pettiest tree we've ever had!” just as my mom had said every year. Every year on Christmas Eve we would open the big packages that had come from our families and celebrate California Christmas. I would have a few pangs of loneliness. Christmas morning we awoke to the happy squeals of our children as they discovered the pile of goodies brought by Santa. Our children all have wonderful memories of Christmas.

Was there a year in your life when everything changed and you just didn't realize it at the time?

Christmas 1989 & 1990

Some Christmas memories are melancholy and always bring a touch of sadness into the joy of the season.


One Sunday afternoon in early December 1989 we were sitting at the kitchen table when the phone rang. It was my brother-in-law calling from Colorado to tell us that my father-in-law had just died of a heart attack. His death was unexpected. He had been in the midst of a busy retirement and enjoying life. The day before he died he had put up the Christmas tree and gone to a children's party where he had played Santa Claus. That morning they had gone to church. In the afternoon he and his wife had sat down to watch their beloved Broncos play football. She turned to say something and he was gone. We flew to Colorado and drove across the snow covered mountains to be with the family. The mountains were beautiful, with all the small towns twinkling with Christmas lights. It looked like a glittery holiday card. Christmas lights reflecting on the snow always remind me of that drive and my wonderful father-in law. Bill was a good man. We still miss him.


Just over a year later we were again sitting at the kitchen table when the phone rang. This call was from my brother. After a very long, difficult illness my father had died of pneumonia. He had been in a nursing home for five years. His last years were hard. I was expecting the call, but it was still hard to believe that my sweet daddy was gone. We flew to California for the funeral. The church was full of friends and family who came to honor this good man. We flew back home on Christmas eve. My children, my grandchildren, and my mother-in-law were waiting for our arrival so the Christmas festivities could begin. My grandchildren were little and very excited about Santa Claus. It was a hard thing to celebrate that year. The joy and the sadness kept getting mixed up.

We love Christmas, as did our fathers before us. I feel their presence every year as we gather to celebrate the joy of being a family.

Christmas 1975

This time of year is so full of memories of times gone by that on many days I tend to get very nostalgic. Recently I came upon this letter to Santa written by my children in 1975. I cherish the memories of my house full of children.

Grandsons

I love my teen aged boys. They always make me smile.

Foot Report

After our feast yesterday my daughter decided to give us all a tattoo. She is learning the fine art of tattooing with henna and wanted to practice. My good right foot was blessed with a beautiful design. My husband's hand was tattooed with the solar system and my son had Mom with a heart around it for his arm. It was a fun activity. I could commit to a two week tattoo.

Several people have asked for a report on my left foot. It is getting better. Recovery has just been harder and is taking longer than I had expected. I am now sixteen weeks post-op. I still have to wear the big orthopedic boot and use crutches in order to walk, but I am starting to walk. I am able to put full weight and the foot. I no longer need to take pain medicine. Yesterday I drove the car for the first time since surgery. My goal is to be walking without help by Christmas. Not being able to do the things I usually do has been frustrating, but this to shall pass. I will dance next year.

Thanksgiving

Today is Thanksgiving Day. We are headed over the river and through the woods to our daughter's home where we will feast on turkey with all the trimmings. (Actually it's just up the road, about ten minutes from here.) There will be a small but thankful crowd around the table. Two of our children and their families will be sharing the day with the in-laws this year. Our grandson will be gone for the first time this year. He is in Texas where he will celebrate with his Air Force buddies.

Take time to count your blessings today and have a wonderful day.
Happy Thanksgiving!

A Teetotaler's Fruitcake

My parent's were teetotalers, as were all their friends. When I was a child I never saw anyone drink anything alcoholic, no beer, no wine, no alcohol. Occasionally I heard a sermon about the sin of drunkenness and I grew up just assuming that good people never drank alcohol. I tell you this so you will understand the following story.

Every Christmas my mother made a fruitcake. The fruitcake making was one of the rituals of preparing for Christmas. One year one of my mom's fellow teachers told her how much better the cake would be if she soaked a cheesecloth in peach brandy and then wrapped it around the cake. The brandy would impart a peach flavor and keep the cake moister. Mom wanted to try this idea, but she had a problem. Dad was an elder in our church. The church did not approve of alcohol . She did not want any of the congregation to see her going into the liquor store, so she drove to a neighboring town to make her purchase. She parked at the store and looked around, then hurried inside to make her purchase. As she left with her little brown bag of brandy she literally bumped into the wife of the other elder in our little church who had also driven to the neighboring town to make a similar purchase. They were both embarrassed and vowed to keep their secret.

I was a young teen that day when mom came in with her arms full of groceries. In an unusual gesture of helpfulness I hopped up and helped her unload groceries. The first thing I pulled out of the grocery bag was her little brown bag with the peach brandy inside. I shrieked with amazement. “Mom, is this really brandy? Did you really buy alcohol?” My poor mom. She was so embarrassed as she explained the whole story to me.

The fruitcake was exceptionally good that year. It was so moist with a hint of peach flavor. Everyone asked for a second serving that year.

Blessings

One of the sweet traditions in our congregation is “The Blessing of the Keys.” Shortly after a young person gets their driver's license the congregation blesses their car keys, praying for safe driving. At the beginning of the service the young person is called to the front of the church and there is a brief prayer. Then the young driver goes for a drive with a selected sponsor. At the end of service they return and the sponsor reports on the young driver's ability. The new driver is then given a new key chain as a token of our blessing.

This morning my seventeen-year-old granddaughter Sofie had her keys blessed. In fact she drove our youth minister to Starbucks and they talked until time to return. Her sponsor gave her an A+ on her driving skills and then said Sofie had received something quite wonderful when she returned to the church parking lot. She had received a phone call from the admissions office of the University of New Haven. Not only had she been admitted, she was awarded a significant scholarship. Her family heard this exciting news with the rest of the church. She truly did feel blessed this morning.

Yesterday I attended my first Bar Mitzvah. It was a beautiful, moving service. I cried several times as this young man was blessed by his family, his religious community and many friends. It is a wonderful thing to watch faith and heritage passed from one generation to the next with such love. Mazel tov David. You filled us all with pride.

I hope all our children all feel blessed with love by their families and their community.