I loved my grandparents. Staying with them in their Texas home was one of the highlights of my childhood. My grandfather was a preacher of the gospel. He was not a very well educated man, but he did know his Bible. We made a game of reading a verse from anywhere in scripture and seeing if he could quote the verse following. He always won. The man had the entire book memorized. I thought he was one of the smartest men in the world. When he was a young preacher he traveled all over Texas holding revival meetings. Families would travel long distances by buggy to hear him preach. My grandmother adored him. She was the perfect preacher's wife. They were married in 1904 and raised five children. They had a long and happy marriage.
I was excited when my cousin gave me the photo album from their fiftieth wedding anniversary. Along with the old pictures the album contains many cards and letters from well wishers. They were all addressed to Brother Fowler and wife. (All grown-ups in the church of my childhood were referred to as Brother or Sister.) When I found the letter my grandfather wrote to my grandmother on the occasion of their golden wedding anniversary I was eager to see what he had said. It seems like a strange and sad love letter to me. I have copied his handwritten letter. How do you feel about this love letter?
“To My Beloved and Faithful Wife
50 years ago today
At first that my seem a long time, but yet the years have passed so swiftly it seems but a little while. Many have been your trials and great have been the disappointments of your life. I wish it were otherwise, but I can not go back to the yesterdays of our life and correct them. The best I know that is left for for me to do is, “I pray that you may have the grace to forgive all the many mistakes I have made.”
The days of our life have been busy days, filled with toil and troubles, yet I am glad to have had you as my companion in it all. I know you have done your part well and faithfully.
The days of our “tomorrow,” at best, can not be many and they will soon be spent. Until the silver cord is broken (loosed) let us try to be cheerful and helpful to each other. May our last days be our best days together. We have climbed the hill of life to the point from which we are able to see far back over the valley of the past where lies the regrets of many things that tend to grieve us, but forgetting these things let us look ahead to the better things further up the way that leads to him who is our life and our our hope. We do not now see him in his fullness but soon he will appear and then we shall see him as he is and then our vile and wrinkled bodies shall be changed and we shall be made like unto the glorious Lord who all along life's way has been watching and waiting for our coming.
It is my hope that the sum of our lives together may be a heritage to our beloved children for whose lives we have a great responsibility.
May we be able to remember all the virtues in the lives of each other and forgive and forget all the vices of whatever nature they may have been.
I know not what you would appreciate most that I might give you on this memorial day, therefore accept this and with it get for yourself whatever will please you most.
God bless you forever and ever.
Your hubby”
12 comments:
Sue, that letter sounds like a letter that Tim could have written...his humility and his worry that he could have done better....yes, sad but truthful. Brought tears to my eyes.
He really loved her - and although he was a preacher - still you can tell that it was hard for him to express the feelings - but his letter is very wise - in that instead of being sad and looking back he is looking to the light ahead and in the present. Your Grandmother would have treasured this letter. how MUCH LONGER DID THEY BOTH LIVE. which ONE DIED FIRST.
Trials, mistakes, toils, vices, disappointments, troubles: what happened? Do you know any of what he is referring to? I think I would feel irritated if my husband referred to our life together in such terms - and I'm even divorced!
And he gave her money for the gift.
I agree that it is a strange, sad love letter, even if you can see that he loved her.
Oops, that was me.
It is lovely and honest. And the most important thing is looking toward God, not back at the things we do that disappoint us. Thank you for sharing that.
When I posted this picture I was thinking what a sweet old couple they were. Then I did the math. In this picture they were exactly the same age as my husband and are now. I guess we are a cute old couple too.
They lived a long while after this.She lived about 15 more years. He lived about 20 more years. They did love one another and that love spilled onto everyone they knew.
What a sweet letter. He may not have been educated but he was very well spoken. Marriages are full of secrets and memories known only to each other.
That letter was simply beautiful.
Their unnamed trials are best kept between them,and no doubt helped to form the obvious bond they shared.
Thank you for this post. We'd like to see the album sometime. I never met them. But, judging by the lives of their children and grandchildren and the memories that are shared of them, they were special people. She died before Tom and I met and he passed away around the time we married. Maybe we'll take a road trip, too, and meander up your direction sometime.
Simply, forever wonderful. You are a cute couple. He is so very serious in his letter and then he signs it "your hubby." Love it.
Well, that definitely was a unique letter...it seemed a bit "formal" to me, though, you know? I guess it was the preacher in him that made it sound that way.
Either way, you can certainly tell that he loved her...and I guess that's the point, anyway, right? :)
They lost two sets of twins. I'm sure that was a sadness that always lingered with them. I know it lingered with Grandma. And they moved around a lot, didn't they? That would have been stressful. It must have been disappointing too, for him to have lost his eyesight. I think it was pretty much gone by this anniversary because Daddy talks about using Grandpa Fowler to drive around Turnbull Canyon with his learner's permit, and Grandpa Fowler was blind. That would have been '53ish.
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